Heyyyy future me,
Its Kay, your 20-year-old self, still here grappling with the fact that I actually turned 20 – no longer a teen, scary! And to think I begged so much for adulthood. Well enough about me, I have so many questions for you. I am anxious to know; are you a lawyer?? Did it really work out? Are you in a steady job? Lord knows reports about the job market are just stressing me out. Do you have the same friends? How is mommy? Did you take the stress away, did you make her smile again? A permanent hearty smile? Oh lord, and I hope you are paying back that loan and SLB haven’t left you depressed. But really how much is the debt??
Have you ‘glowed up’ yet *smirk*? Please tell me your skin is clear and hair finally healthy and striving. How is your love life…well do you have a love life? I hope so *smirk*. Do you still write, and have you had the courage to share? How spiritual have you been if any at all? Have you become more confident in yourself and I really do hope you are taking care of your health. I am shy, afraid and I am eager to know if it will all work out, eager to find out if it has been worth it.
Let me pull myself together because my letter to you isn’t about all the accomplishments…or that which is hoped for. I am just passing through to show some love. There is no way you will ever disappoint me unless you give up. I love you and I hope you love you too…unconditionally, independent of any accomplishment, any physical ‘glow up’ or material success, I hope you love you. Remember your journey, you are strong, with a spirit filled with patience, love, and grace. I am proud of you, despite how you may feel in this moment, whether you feel behind in life or ahead, I am so proud of you. You are here, wherever you are, so it is not over, you have as many chances as you like.
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Embrace that mindset and live in the moment. Finally, dear, you are blessed – be grateful! Gratitude can cure a multitude of ills. It will quiet the failure and negatives, unveiling to you all the blessings you have ignored. Life will unfold in unexpected events but do not be afraid, stand firm, because you are made for this and so much more
Despite all the complexities you see in life, it’s an illusion. Just stay close to God, take great care of mommy and yourself, show love to your family and always try your best. So, my heroine, take a breath, I am working really hard so worry will be little in your experience.
Your 20-year-old self.
Written By Kjai Francis | All Rights Reserved
I’m a 2nd-year law student, just trying to find her place in this rapidly changing world, navigating my way through the law to find the spot which I’m almost sure was just made for me. Vibrant and fun beneath a quiet shield, like the awakening of nature bursting through the stillness before dawn. A country girl at heart, the product of a tiny community in St. Elizabeth…but I’ve got big dreams…
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